So, fuck it, we are constantly working on this thing called life. How to sustain an art practice in the midst of the dirge. Its all quite a drag isnt it- the brexit and the bullshit , threatening our freedoms. I have taken to not even looking at the news so much anymore – And we’re all worried that were not feeling okay, we’re kind of anxious or pretty much consumed. & constantly working on the work. Going to work, working on keeping a roof above our heads and sustainable eco-friendly vegan food on the table. I think a lot of the time how did my mother do it with all of us kids, five of us? I know i’m barely keeping it together with only myself to care for. And i’m tiptoeing across precarity the same as anyone else I suppose. altho this is also supposed to be THE PRIME OF MY LIFE, and I should be living it up! Which is of course another thing to worry about. My heads all over the place most of the time. Im worried a lot about working too much or not working enough and not seeing my friends enough and HOW TO SUSTAIN MY PRACTICE AND STAY SANE. Im waiting for the burst of energy that comes sometimes & when it does it feels amazing and I can actually get a lot of stuff done as opposed to the daily struggle to get ur head off your pillow. it fuckin sucks. Ive started doing yoga videos off the internet and trying to get outside more and breathe in the sweet sea air. Im lucky enough to live by the sea its great its free and pretty healing, but got to keep working on the work– I know that its hot topic for arts institutions and funders to try to ‘diversify’ the opportunities- but finding that time and headspace to do a good enough application in the first place is goddamn hard. clean your clothes call ur estate agent about the mice go to therapy wurk on the applications the emails the life admin pay ur bills and sweep the floors make your bed wash behind your ears go to work cut up the vegetables keep your boss happy keep it tidy dont be late never be late sorry im late.